


Zombie

by Hawkgay



Series: Indelible Ink [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Bucky dehumanizes the shit out of himself at the begining, Clint and Bucky are on a trip to find themselves, M/M, Not Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Some Humor, photographer bucky, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-08-10 21:25:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7861663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkgay/pseuds/Hawkgay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Soldier had been on the run for over a year when he's found by the Avenger 'Hawkeye'. Both of them are hiding from their problems as they spark up an unusual friendship. Bucky starts to learn to be human again, and gain back what Hydra stole from him, while Clint deals with the aftermath left in the wake of Shield being alive. Nipping at their heels is Steve and Natasha, the two of them chasing the myth of the Winter Soldier.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Zombie

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd like usual

The _Winter Soldier_ never expected to be found, it had taken the necessary steps to keep itself hidden. It lived in a condemned building in the outskirts of Bucharest and when the _Soldier_ needed to leave it always took the long route around to cover its tracks. It rarely needed to leave but sometimes when the _Memories_ surfaced of blood on snow, screaming and ice, the room it inhabited started to shrink with only what the _Soldier_ had done for company. Then it would flee onto the streets and aimlessly walk for hours until the feelings passed. Its mistake had been not noticing it'd become a daily occurrence. When the assailant forced it into a disgusting side alley, it quickly turned and pinned him to a wall. Using an arm it held the aggressor in place by slowly applying pressure to his neck. Finally it was able to look at the person who'd ambushed it in the eye, it took a moment for the identity to register before the half remembered information went through its mind.

Name: Barton, Clint

Alias: Hawkeye

Age: 44

Threat Status: Negligible

Occupation: Ex-Shield agent, current Avenger.

Human: no enhancements.

Main weapon: bow and arrow

Misc: Best marksmen in the world. Long distance fighter.

 “In a moment I am going to release you, after that you will remain here and not follow me once I'm gone. Understand?” its voice low and rough from under use. Releasing Barton, it watched him slide down the wall. Crouching on the ground getting his breath back the _Soldier_ turned around and started to walk away.

“I wouldn't go out there if I was you, Shield should be swarming the area any moment now”

 it winced at the mention of that name, it refused to allow them to take the _Soldier_ alive. It'd kill every single person who'd even try to get close enough to capture it. No more wipes, no more torture and certainly no more trigger words. Facing back at the fallen Avenger, something in it relaxed. The defiant set of the man's jaw made the _Soldier_ remember a flash of something half forgotten. A blue eyed boy slouched on a filthy floor with bright scarlet blood dripping from his nose, a bruise blooming on his far too pale face. A relic from a lifetime it barely recalled. Since the _Asset_ had been free it had started to note down anything that came back to its shattered mind. Right now it wanted to be able to jot down the exact _Memory_ before it faded but it still had a job to do.

 Moving forward a few steps the _Soldier_ picked Barton up by his shirt with its metal arm and barked in his face. “Who sent you, you've got five minutes to talk before I send you back to your Shield buddies in a body bag,” adding to how much it was not kidding, it took out the knife sequestered in the right arm of its hoodie. Holding it close enough to the skin of Barton's neck to draw a few droplets of blood.

 “Wait, wait, wait, wait no one sent me,” Barton barely breathed as he started to talk, “Shield are actually after me and are good guys. They are the ones taking out Hydra and keeping them busy. They don't even know you're alive. Fuck I'm only here cause I needed to get away and this seemed more fun than anything else Natasha told me abou-” the last words left Barton's mouth before realizing he'd fucked up by the darkening in its eyes.

 “Quiet, you said no one sent you yet the Black Widow is the one who gave up my information. The truth now why are you really here” voice soft with a dangerous edge it demanded more answers.

 Barton thought for a moment, like he didn't know where to start before speaking “the truth? I gained a superpower, found out Shield still lived and the dude running it was my ex-lover I thought had died three years ago. Then when I decided to run away Natasha gave me a few options of things to do. You were at the top of the list and when I read what happened to you I thought I could help” reading the archer's face as he talked it saw an undercurrent of pain and betrayal turn into sincerity and determination.

 “I doubt it, I want to get out of here. Tell me how you did it so I can leave,” the _Soldier_ snapped back at him.

 “Here's the thing, my power only works by skin to skin contact. Cameras still see me but normal people can't. I'll get you out if you let me talk to you properly back at your hovel without you trying to kill me and maybe let me help” considering the offer it stood there for a moment until interrupted by the other assassin still clasped in its metal death grip “you can remove the knife and let me down now.”

 “fine, but your attempts are misguided. The Winter Soldier is beyond anyone's help” unceremoniously the _Soldier_ dropped him in a heap on the floor. The sooner this man understood his charity was futile the better.

 Picking himself up Barton replied “they said that about Natasha once, she proved them wrong. She sent me here so she believes something in you is worth saving. I trust her judgement even if I don't trust you yet”

 Silence was the answer it gave. It watched the other assassin like a wary cat as he grabbed the _Soldier's_ flesh hand and pulled, letting him take it out of the trash strewn alley and back into the sun lit streets. Nostalgia flooded inside of its chest, maybe there was something left of a ghost only Captain America remembered.

  


****

  
  


Steve surveyed his bedroom, trying to figure out if he'd left anything important behind in his packing away. Over a two months had gone by since Clint went AWOL. The reason Natasha had given to his disappearance had been a vague notion of needing time after the surprise of both gaining a superpower and finding out the organization he'd given his life too was alive. It'd put the Avengers in a tight spot, they were down three members leaving them woefully unprepared for another world ending cataclysm. Steve understood vanishing too would make the problem worse but he'd spent too much time in at home rather than follow his heart. Everyone guessed he'd spent the last few trips searching for the Winter Soldier, Steve doubted they knew the real reasons behind his search. Stuffing the last of his shirts into a duffle bag he left his bedroom to find Natasha perched on a kitchen counter, a full bag next to her and her face in a blank mask.

 She eyed him for a full minute before asking “Steve is it really worth going out looking for him again, last time we only found false leads and dead ends.”

 He'd expected either Sam or Natasha to try and stop him, Steve could see why they would. Except every time Steve closed his eyes now he saw Bucky's face as he fell into the ravine before changing to the dead eyed stare of the Winter Soldier from that day on the highway. The failure haunted Steve.

 “don't even question me about this Nat, Bucky's out there and he needs me. I couldn't save him before and now I can” emotion broke through to Steve's voice, he wanted Natasha to understand more than anything else.

 “this is going to sound harsh but what if he doesn't want to come back or be saved. He's never gonna be the same Bucky you knew before, what Hydra did leaves marks. No one comes out that shit unscathed, I should know.” Natasha remained calm as she spoke, her eyes boring into what felt like his soul.

 Sometimes Steve could kick himself, of course she understood what it was to be unmade and turned into a weapon. He tried to smile weakly as he apologized “I'm really sorry I've been an insensitive ass. I know he's changed I'm not expecting a miracle I just want to protect my friend. The people responsible are still out there, they could try getting him back at any time. I can't sit idly by while he's in danger.” the last part he meant with the full fiber of his being. Steve's endless search was less about holding on to the last bit of his past and more keeping Bucky out of Hydra's grasp.

 Nat's mask finally broke as she replied “I wasn't going to stop you anyway, I just wanted to make sure you understood.” She laughed under her breath and gave a genuine smile “It's funny, you sound so much like Clint after he found me. You two aren't close but he's the reason I'm even here. Now I don't tell anyone about what happened to me before or after the Red Room, I trust you enough to tell you some of it and to not blab to anyone else” She seemed to expect a reaction from him, a little sign she could keep talking.

 with a nod from him Nat began speaking “when Clint found me I was a mess, I'd been hunted down by the last people who hired me, out numbered they beat the shit out of me until I managed to escape. I stood in the middle of a warehouse, covered in scratches, a broken wrist and a bunch of other injuries expecting to die. Hoping I would die because I had done such unspeakable things I knew I could never make up for. Instead Clint came down from the rafters, took one look at me and picked me up. All the while whispering to me I was safe and no one would hurt me cause he'd be there to protect me. And for the first time in my life I believed someone. I can see the same thing I saw in Clint's eyes that day so I'm coming with you. You don't need to be alone in this Steve.” a small glint of tears shimmered on her cheek before she quickly wiped it away and jumped off the work top.

 Her words stuck in Steve's mind, a part of him had always wanted to the know the truth behind Natasha's life. He refused to even look in any of her old files to find out, it felt like a betrayal of trust to someone Steve already considered a friend. It broke his heart to know she suffered through something he could barely imagine. Growing up he had plenty of reasons to hold on, he couldn't leave his Ma alone in the world and then he'd met Bucky. Something about the older boy enamored Steve from the first meeting as children. Even during the depression and the loss of Sarah Rogers Bucky had been a constant in his life. Sometimes he forgot not everyone grew up with that type of relationship.

 In a few strides Steve walked towards Natasha and brought her in for a hug.“I'm glad you told me Nat, it means a lot you trust me. Clint's really lucky to find a girl as amazing as you”

 Natasha snorted into his shoulder before pushing Steve away “Oh my God, Steve, Clint's gay”

 “B-but at Shield” confusion swept through Steve, during the times off from missions people at Shield seemed to be always talking about the celebrity power couple of Natasha and Clint.

 “Really you believed Shield rumors, it was a spy organization filled with bored spies. Most of them were full of pure bullshit. Just me and Clint's ones tended to be well thought out.”

 Steve went quiet, the gears turning in his head as he tried to understand what Natasha just said. It made sense in a weird way, something had been off about the whole thing but asking either of them seemed rude. He continued to stand there confused and Natasha tried to not laugh.

When he didn't get the joke she explained with a bemused expression “We made it up ourselves once I'd been allowed free reign, cocky asshole agents kept hitting on me whenever I was out of my room and Clint had a crush on a higher up. After I sent the third person to medical we decided the best way to deal with it was to lie, so several times we let people “catch” us in compromising positions and let Shield's rumor mill do its work.”

 “Please tell me the higher up wasn't Fury” Steve begged, a small part of him not wanting to know the answer.

 “Nah, Coulson” nonchalantly Natasha replied, a smirk still on her mouth.

 “Well that explains a lot, is it the reason he-?”

 “Left, yes. He'll be back eventually, he needs some time to adjust to his new powers. We should really be leaving now, the flight I booked will be leaving soon” Natasha's change of the subject seemed deliberate. By the way she spoke he felt her hiding something. Probably to do with Clint and his disappearance. Both of them picked up their bags and went to tell the others they were leaving.

  


**Author's Note:**

> I spent ages on this so please Kudos and comment <3
> 
> title from the song Zombie by the Cranberries


End file.
